A breakup is never easy and can cause the sort of emotional pain that is difficult to move on from. Giving ourselves the space to grieve and process what has happened is vital, but after some time spent doing this, it’s vital to move on, however impossible this may seem.
Keep reading for ways to help you get back on your feet again, ready to follow your own unique and beautiful path again.
Take Some Time
Firstly, moving on is only possible if you’ve first taken the time you need to reflect on what happened and to feel your emotions fully and completely. Allow yourself to cry, to feel angry, and to think about the relationship and the break-up. Speak and spend time with friends, if this is helpful, and express how you’re feeling. Allow them to help and support you if this feels like the right thing to do, and don’t be afraid to tell them what you need – chances are, they will jump at the chance to do whatever they can to assist you.
Journaling may be helpful at this point as a way of processing your emotions and allowing yourself to get down on paper, with no holds barred, exactly what you want to say. You may wish to write a letter to your ex – not to send, but simply as a way of releasing your feelings and letting go of any anger you’re experiencing.
Sometimes, the normal emotions surrounding a break-up can last a long time and even slip into depression. If you think this is happening, or has happened, in your case, then it’s vital to speak with your doctor, who can help you get back on track and give you the support you need to get through this difficult time.
Reconnect With Yourself
Taking up hobbies and interests that may have fallen by the wayside over the course of your relationship is a really good way to move on after a painful break-up. Whether you loved to paint, practice yoga, or have a longstanding interest in spiritualism (and if the latter is the case, you might want to check out MysticSense, which covers everything from tarot readings to astrology to meditation to life coaching) reconnecting with something you love is a way to show yourself some care and refocus your energy.
If there’s something you’ve always wanted to learn about or study, then post break-up is a fantastic time to get started: as well as providing some helpful distraction, learning something new will boost your confidence, help you connect with people, and allow you to begin looking to the future once more.
Be Mindful Of Social Media
Although it depends on the type of break-up you’ve been through, in the vast majority of cases, you’ll be well-advised to avoid keeping your eye on your ex’s social media pages. It can be easy to become fixated on our ex-partner’s feed and find ourselves losing hours to checking their Facebook and Insta, looking for clues regarding how they’re feeling, or for the slightest hint of a new partner, obsessing over every image, reaction, or comment.
Very little good can ever come from Facebook stalking, so you may be better doing yourself a favor and taking a complete break from social media for a while when a relationship has ended to allow you to process your feelings without this additional potential for upset.
Nurture Your Body And Mind
In the immediate aftermath of a break-up, it’s understandable to seek solace in whatever brings you comfort – such as extra-large tubs of ice cream and family-size bars of chocolate. However, taking care of your body and mind is vital to start feeling better and will boost your mood, too.
Try to eat regularly, if you can, and choose nutritious food that nurtures the body and mind: chunky vegetable soup with crusty bread, pasta bakes, and casseroles are all nutritious, comforting choices. Snack healthily, too – opt for yogurt, nuts, chopped fruit, or oatcakes topped with cream cheese to keep your energy levels up
Sleeping may be difficult in the immediate aftermath of a break-up, and yet it’s also one of your best friends when it comes to helping you manage the pain of this period. Try a warm bath and a milky drink before bed, spritzing some lavender sleep spray on your pillow, or meditating for a short time before bed, to help you drift off naturally. Keeping your bedroom a device-free zone is also a great idea: the blue light emitted by phones, laptops, etc., has a disruptive effect on sleep.
Moving Onwards And Upwards
Be as gentle as possible with yourself during this difficult period, and as hard as it may be to imagine, try to keep in mind that this tough stage of your life will pass and that you will find love again when the time is right.
Use the tips above to look after yourself – self-nurturing is crucial and will help you both to get through the days and weeks following a break-up and to gather the fortitude needed to move on.